Sunday, 29 April 2012

Reflections




Apologies for the sad and neglected nature of this blog. I wasn't sure at first if I would keep it up now that the program is finished but after hearing from my mom that apparently some people out there actually read it, I figured I'd better keep going. I'm actually in Vancouver right now for some much needed family time and to get my affairs in order and get my brand spanking new car! This also means I have an actual internet connection, so here's my first post post-program: a ton of photos! Stay tuned for more photos from our trip to Gwaii Haanas.
 
Jags Coffee in Skidegate. My favourite spot for a good cup of coffee and some awesome company.


This is how we do homework in Haida Gwaii. By the light of our headlamps.

The Port Clements Museum. A big room full of raaaaaandom things.

The white raven, the now-deceased mascot of Port. The other thing Port's famous for is the Golden Spruce....also dead.

Old logging equipment outside the Port Museum.

...with students in the shot for scale!

One of the many little islands in the inlet in front of Charlotte. The smoke is from a fire we made on a kayaking trip.

The Goat Man Tree. I don't know where the name comes from but it's mad fun climbing.

Charlotte on a cold, clear morning as I headed into town to catch the bus to school.

Me, red hair, in Port.

The Port dock...wharf....thing. It's lovely and apparently people swim off it in the summer.

CMT - culturally modified tree.

A clear cut block with massive blowdown in Jeskatla.

Moss :)

A huge CMT out in Jeskatla.

An abandoned Haida canoe, likely left due to massive deaths in the carver's family during the smallpox epidemic.

Thursday, 12 April 2012

Post #37

This is my 37th post. An unremarkable number, really. But tomorrow is the final day of the program that I'm doing here so 37 somehow feels monumental. By 1:30pm tomorrow I will be finished my final presentation and my reason for coming here in the first place will be....well, over.

I had dinner with one of the people I consider something of a mentor here and at one point she asked me what I'd learned about myself over the past four months. I looked at her and then looked out the window and thought about it for a few minutes (I think before I speak sometimes now, it's all very strange) and said, "I don't think I learned anything, I just remembered things I'd kind of forgotten."

I'd forgotten that I am independent, quiet, introspective, shy, brave. I'd forgotten that I'm physically pretty strong and have good balance and can scamper up steep banks and through mud and jump far and climb trees. I'd forgotten that I can get dirty and be cold and survive in the same wardrobe of 12 shirts, two pairs of pants, four pairs of shoes and four sweaters for four months and be really, really happy doing it. I'd forgotten what it's like to only be responsible for myself and, at the same time, actually be responsible for myself. No one picks up my slack. Right now I'm so focused on my final presentation tomorrow that all my dishes are in my sink and all my clothes are in the laundry (literally, I'm borrowing an outfit for tomorrow) and my sheets are a bit smelly frankly and I don't have much in the way of groceries and my hair...my hair is filthy. And I am so incredibly happy knowing that I am responsible for dealing with all of these things. When I slip while I'm hiking, no one catches me. When I need to jump down from the bottom branch of a tree I've climbed, no one offers me a hand. It's not because I'm spending my time with a callous group of jerks who don't care, or that I've spent the past years of my life being babied by everyone around me, it's just that the assumption here is that I will take care of myself.

Tomorrow another short piece of my life ends and another one begins. I will become a resident of these islands (not a local, that takes about 25 years of living here apparently). Oh, I'll still be 'one of the college students' for a long time to come I think, but to myself at least I'll be someone who lives here. A redheaded, freckled, researcher-turned-barista who lives in a town of 945 people and has an empty path before her. She is not the girl I thought I was, she doesn't live in the place I thought I'd live, she doesn't do the things I thought I'd do or love the people I thought I'd love but I love that I am her.

A month or so ago, when things were really hard and really bad, my friend K told me to rebuild myself, but to build myself in myself this time, not in another person or a place. And I think I'm succeeding in that. I feel free, capable of picking up and moving anywhere, of finding a hole in a community and filling it in some meaningful way. I am on my own now.

Friday, 30 March 2012

That Which Makes Us Haida


An interview with Nika Collison, one of the major influencing forces in my life right now, on That Which Makes Us Haida, an incredible book and currently also a new exhibit at the Bill Reid Gallery at MOA. The Haida language revival process here is an amazing thing to see; I've been very lucky to see inside the Skidegate Haida Immersion Program (SHIP) which is the school that Nika talks a bit about in the interview. It's an amazing group of Elders and teachers working tirelessly to save, preserve and revive their language. I'm learning tiny bits here and there and loving every minute of it.

Also....

This weekend? Gwaii Haanas National Park Reserve and Haida Heritage Site. Trip of a lifetime.

Snowshoeing and Disney Princesses

Sleeping Beauty is the gorgeous mountain peak that dominates the skyline on the west end of Charlotte.

The suuuuuper snowy one towards the right
 Last Sunday dawned bright and sunny and, with the help of a local friend who owns a truck and a LOT of pairs of snowshoes, a group of us decided to climb it.

Me in my gear! Also, I have red hair now.


The bay on the left is Charlotte. We're a long way from home!


Blue line on the horizon? Yeah, that's the ocean. 


That's just as steep as it looks. And there was about six feet of snow. Thank GOD for snowshoes.


Friday, 23 March 2012

Tankers? No thankers.

My dear Babz (daddy) informed me today that it's been about ten days since I posted last. I couldn't actually see him shaking an admonishing finger at me but I could imagine it. So, here I am!

We just started our final course, Rain Forest Ecology. Though the class is interesting I'm definitely starting to check out of the school part of this experience as I start to think more and more about what my life here is going to be like. I have paying-the-bills-and-having-a-good-time-type work lined up for the summer and two solid leads on career-furthering-and-actually-using-my-skills-type work, one lead in Charlotte and one in Skidegate and Old Massett.

I played hookey today and yesterday to attend the Enbridge Northern Gateway Project Joint Review Panel (JRP) in Skidegate. The experience was absolutely incredible. The point of the JRP, at this point in the process, is to hear oral evidence from the Haida and non-Haida residents of the communities that will be affected by the proposed pipeline and, in our case, super tankers in the Hecate Strait. It was two solid days of oral history, personal stories, origin stores, Haida language, songs and prayers. The anxiety and distress about the proposed project is tenable here. The fear and anger in the room was incredible. The idea of a spill in the Hecate and the affect that would have on every single person living on these islands is something the people here cannot allow. Everyone here depends on the ocean for the majority of their food. Fishing, and shellfish and seaweed gathering are major events here. The communities empty when the fish are in season. Actually empty. Businesses close. For days on end. The west beaches of the islands are already occasionally filled with the strange flotsam and jetsam of the shipping lines out in the Pacific. Today I heard a friend tell of a kayaking trip up the west coast during which he found over 150 Thermarest mattresses. Another friend told me there were a couple of months when the beaches, even on the east side, kept washing up left-handed hockey gloves.

It's also very strange to be learning about Gwaii Haanas National Park Reserve and Haida Heritage Site, the protected area that is the bottom third to a half of Haida Gwaii, an area that let (forced?) the federal government and Haida Nation have agreed to set aside their differences in order to co-manage, and simultaneously know that the government is considering running supertankers on a route that would be profoundly changed by the introduction of any toxic substances. What are we even protecting this for?

I was talking to the professor of our case studies class last night and she made a great point. We've been learning all through this program about the Haida value of Yah'guudang (in English, respect) and she got this funny look on her face and said, "You know, I think if we could just get this whole respect thing, that would be the end of research. The answers would be so obvious. It wouldn't be 'hey, how much of this toxin can we put in this river without poisoning everything? It would just be 'hey, that's a terrible thing to put in that river cause it might poison stuff.' You know?" This is not some island hippy saying this, this is a woman who describes herself as a scientist (and rightfully so) and told us on first meeting us that there's nothing magical about Haida Gwaii, it's just a place like anywhere else (much to all our horror in our shiny-faced enthusiasm).

What my prof said rang very true for me. Its frustrating, having worked now in several different health fields and learning what I have about natural resources over the past three months. If people would just think and stop throwing money and economics around like it's going out of style. Just stop and think about how to do things in an adaptive, place-based, respect-driven way. Wouldn't we all be better off?


Tuesday, 13 March 2012

Today's Accomplishments

1. Made it from my lovely warm bed to my seat in the classroom in 35 minutes. One small step for Cait, one giant moment of hate for daylight-savings-time-inspired-dark-mornings.

2. Learned about and ate a lot of seaweed. It's delicious, nutritious, abundant and FREE.

3. Biked to Lawn Hill. 44km round-trip. Exercise win but planning fail due to unexpectedly intense headwind on the way home. In combination with snow. And forgetting to bring a snack.

4. Made a beautiful fire and heated my home with my own two hands.

This evening's plan: finish my lentil soup and grilled cheese, make some tea, write about the ecology and history of the Sgaan Kinghlas Seamount, read birth stories from Old Massett and peruse a thesis I stumbled upon on retention of rural physicians that just happens to use the Queen Charlotte Hospital and Haida Gwaii as its case study.

I miss you all so very, very much but this experience and this time in my life defies description. The agony and the ecstasy.